In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Randomize