I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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