Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
