ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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