left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.