i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
