it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Of course I have a pirate flag
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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