I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
