that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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