I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
