Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
