I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
it's like heaven, but drunker
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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