woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
