How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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