So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
