So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
