If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
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