idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Randomize
