Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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