On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
