I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Omg I joined a choir last night...
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
