Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
