I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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