these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize