Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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