my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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