It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
She even gives head with a lisp.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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