My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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