He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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