at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize