singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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