Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize