am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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