so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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