Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
