he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
