You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
