Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
