i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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