My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize