Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Randomize
