the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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