I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
