Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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