Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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