I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Randomize
