Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
