Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
