I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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