Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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