i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I think people are normalizing furries
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize